A bread-and-butter gift is a token gift that you usually give en masse to folks on your list.  Your neighbors, your friends at church, your co-workers, your spouse’s co-workers, your neighbor’s co-workers, your paper boy, your hairdresser, your Great Aunt Matilda…  Token is the operative word.  I like to think of weird things and I usually manage to humiliate one or more of my children.  I just bet some of you could come up with some ideas just as strange as these.

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~ Parchment Paper
I bought a case of 1000 at a restaurant supply store.
I took 20 pieces, rolled them up, with a  paper explaining  it,
and tied them with ribbon or raffia.
This was met with squeals of exultation or blank stares.

~  Teresa’s Pan Spread
I got this recipe from a friend who cooks for large groups regularly.
Equal parts: Crisco, vegetable oil, flour
Beat in mixer on high speed until smooth.
Keep in fridge.
I use it in cooking all the time, in place of No-stick cooking spray.
I bought cute little pastry brushes to go with the jar.
[Moth-ER! I can’t beLIEVE you are giving grease to people as a gift!]

~ Al’s Sweet Hot Mustard

4 oz. dry mustard
 (buy this in bulk at health food store)
1 cup white vinegar
2 cups sugar
8 eggs

Mix mustard and vinegar and let sit for at least 8 hours.
Add sugar and eggs.
In double boiler, stir over steaming water until it thickens.
Store in pint jars in refrigerator.
I double the recipe and make several batches.

~ Hamburger Jerky

12 pounds (elk) hamburger
2 – 3 T liquid smoke
1 T tenderizer
3 T onion powder
2 T lemon pepper
2 T seasoned salt
2 T garlic powder
4 1/2 T red pepper flakes
2 cups brown sugar
1 cup Yoshida’s Gourmet Sauce
1 T hot sauce

Mix well and load into a jerky gun.
Dry in food dryer.

* * * * * * * * *
This year’s token is Hot Fudge Sauce.
The others are ideas for the future.

~ Hot Fudge Sauce

1 C sugar
1/4 C baking cocoa
1/4 C corn starch
1 C boiling water
1 T butter
1 tsp real vanilla

Combine sugar, cocoa, and cornstarch in a saucepan.
Add water and cook over medium-high heat  slowly until thick.
Remove from heat an stir in butter and vanilla until smooth.
Already I’ve messed up a big batch! Yikes!
It took so long to thicken, I started reading blogs…
Next batch, I’m simmering instead of medium-heating.

~ BBQ Sauce

1 T liquid smoke
2 # 10 cans ketchup
5 lbs honey
2 C prepared mustard
2 C vinegar
1 tsp onion powder
1/4 C Worcestershire Sauce

~ Sheri’s Homemade Chai Mix
12 tsp tea leaves

Grind, but not too fine:
24 cardamom
6 sticks cinnamon
24 cloves

1 1/2 tsp ground ginger
2 1/2 cup sugar

Mix together.

To use:
3 T mix + 2 C water
Boil 10-15 minutes
Add 1/2 cup milk.
Strain and drink.

~  Healthy Vinaigrette

Recipe here.

~ Brenda’s Poppyseed Loaf

Message me, if you’d like the recipe.
It’s too long for this.
But oh my, it is my husband’s favorite.

~ Lemon Curd

Recipe and photos here.
Limbolady recommended this *with a box of gingersnaps*!

photo taken yesterday by son Collin

I wrote here about the problem.  Some friends of mine can help with solutions.

Alyssa is a natural shopper.  She finds wonderful bargains and is always looking for potential gifts.  Shopping, after all, is a skill. Alyssa knows which stores to avoid and which stores to patronize.  She instinctively knows where to look; she also knows when to shop; finally she knows her recipients.  She finds treasures on the after-holiday clearance shelves, she has good taste, and she considers her loved ones when she shops.  When she finds a product she particularly loves– socks, tea or gardener’s hand-creme– she looks for a supplier with the best price.  Alyssa doesn’t spend outrageous sums: she knows how to convert two dollars into a small plant or a special candle that says, “I appreciate you.” Alyssa keeps a gift drawer and usually resists the impulse to give her treasures prematurely. 

Chloe is creative.  Chloe always gives a piece of herself.  She used to scrapbook, but now leans more toward computer graphics and photography.  Chloe jumps in the deep end: her first quilt was a queen-sized duvet for her husband’s parents. When she sits down, she picks up her yarn and needles.  Chloe gave her college-age kids and their best friends a shipment of homemade cookies every month  as a high school graduation gift.  Chloe listens.  When her friend mentioned how much she’d like a tea cozy, Chloe converted a scrap of peculiar fabric into a way-cool cozy.  When Chloe’s pastor’s wife went through a series of medical procedures, Chloe wrote a note of encouragement to her each week. 

Clarissa, by the way, does it all.  It would be fun to hate Clarissa, but it would also be impossible. She’s just too wonderful.  Clarissa is the queen of gift baskets.  Clarissa does everything by dozens.  She reupholsters furniture in her spare time.  She probably plays the trombone in secret, just for fun. She makes cinnamon rolls for Christmas morning. Ask Clarissa how she gets it all done and she shrugs as if you’d asked her how she manages to breathe. 

My favorite gift, the bread-and-butter-gift, tomorrow!

What would you add to this list of give and takes?
     

I’m trying, really trying, not to make this a rant.  I’m just saying.  There is a difference.  As I type, I am trying to keep my written voice low and steady.  No screamin’ meamies allowed. 

This thought began in July when a house down the street from us put the makings of a garage sale on the corner of their lot with a sign that said, FREE. [Our Salvation Army went out of business (!); which means there is no local entity that accepts donations.] The pile sat there for day after day after day. Weeks later the lonely and neglected pile remained. Gracious, I thought, we have become such a prosperous people that we can’t even give away our stuff.   

This morning, while I was serenely sipping tea and soaking in the heat from the wood stove, I received an SOS call from a relative who was shopping, totally bereft of gift ideas for certain loved one.  “I feel your pain,” was about the best I could do. 

The problem is that everyone on my list, down to my grandson, fits that description. 

Our lack of want is stealing some of the joy, don’t you think?  We’ve become victims of our own prosperity.

Because I’m not a shopper, I’m not a good gift giver.  I’d rather clean toilets than shop in a store full of grimacing people listening to tinny canned music.  And if I give into the temptation to procrastinate I find myself in the most loathsome position possible:  wandering around WalMart on December 22nd, looking for some plastic thing made in China to wrap and give.  Blech.

Because I’m not a good observer, I’m not a good gift giver.  I really don’t remember which colors my daughters (in-law) love to wear.  Or what makes my mother-in-law’s eyes light up.   An organized person would have a little notebook and  keep track throughout the year.  An observant person would know without the notebook…

The fact is that it is easy to get gifts for people who share the same tastes and interests that you do.  When you see/read/smell/taste/drink something you love, you know that person would also love it.  Somehow, we often end up related to people who don’t share our tastes!  My friend put it well:  [insert name] and I always give each other hair products because we just don’t know each other very well even though we are closely related. 

Perfectionism can also block the way.  The search for the perfect gift, the one sure to delight, can keep us from getting something pretty good. 

Thus far, the problem.

The truth is that it is more joyful to give than to receive.  Do you remember the moment when you got it right?  When the gift was opened and then the eyes opened wide?  The little “o”, and the sucked in breath?  The wonder? The delight? 

Gifts should be an expression of love, not a tribute to obligation.  How do we express our love in a way that is fitting, true, full of delight? 

More to come….