When we took car trips our teenaged boys used to scan the horizon looking for cool cars.  Their heads swiveled as they yelled, “Jaguar!” with whatever mysterious letters that are part of car models: XK, SE, GTS, CLK, MKS, MKZ, yadda, yadda, yadda. 

They saved their paper route and lawn care earnings and bought their first car or truck when they were 15 or 16.  Rule # 1 was that they had to pay cash for the vehicle (a rule we have followed ourselves).  Money is the number one struggle for many marriages. We wanted them to learn to wait, especially with an optional purchase, and to view voluntary debt with disgust.  No car payments allowed. 

Beyond that, I was attempting to change their view, persistently persuading them to think house instead of car.  If you drop all your available funds into a car, where will you find a down payment for a house?  I explained the tax law which is quite favorable to handyman-guys willing to build up some sweat equity. 

You can purchase a house, a junker; live in it for at least two years while you fix it up into a cute starter home; sell it, and reinvest your gain into another house.  The gain, if you reinvest, is tax free.  The sticking point is getting into the first house/trailer/shack.   It’s tough.  It takes long-term perspective.  But it can be done.  Our oldest son bought a home when he was nineteen with minimal assistance from us.   

Higher education plays a considerable part in the puzzle.   It is expensive.  I prayed that my  middle son would graduate from college debt-free, and the answer has been  “No.”  My intention is to do a better job researching avenues to ameliorate the load for our youngest.   Our assistance has been  minimal – part of me wishes it were more. The other part likes the independence and strength that develops when you put yourself through.